Dear Katherine,

you’ve always been someone who i feel so inspired by. i find you admirable in countless ways. i’m struggling to put myself first without feeling guilty for other people. how do you always do what’s best for you? no matter what i do, my empathy gets in the way of putting myself first every time.

love,

kezzie <3

My Dearest Kezzie,

Ah, guilt—the invisible leash that keeps too many people stuck fetching everyone else’s happiness while theirs collects dust. You say empathy gets in the way, but darling, real empathy isn’t self-sacrifice; it’s balance. You can care about others without setting yourself on fire to keep them warm.

Putting yourself first doesn’t mean pushing everyone else off a cliff (tempting as that may be). It’s not either-or—it’s both-and. You can be kind and have boundaries. You can care for others and say no. You can show up for people without disappearing in the process.

So next time guilt creeps in, remind yourself: you’re not a background character in everyone else’s story—so start acting like the main character.

With all my wicked little heart,

Katherine